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Douglas FraserHolyrood blog: Last lap for Labour
Posted by Douglas Fraser at 4:20pm on Mon 12 May 08
Stop Press, Exclusive Scoop, etc!!

Wendy Alexander is set to announce a new challenge to the SNP about the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow. Scheduled for 2014, she is to tell Alex Salmond to "bring them on" – arguing that if the SNP is genuine in its enthusiasm for staging the Games in Glasgow, it should legislate for them to take place the year before then, in 2013.

Labour's thinking is that it needs to show "the hollowness of the SNP's commitment to the Commonwealth Games". According to one insider: "If New Delhi can stage the games in 2010, what on earth are we waiting for? If Alex Salmond were really behind Glasgow's games, he could even try to get in ahead of the Indian capital and have the Games next year."

The sudden shift of tactics is understood to have caused tensions with Prime Minister Gordon Brown, who fears that if Scottish Labour wants the Glasgow Commonwealth Games to be staged one year earlier than planned, he may come under pressure to bring the London Olympics forward to 2011 - potentially sending costs soaring. His spokesman says is is "not persuaded" of the case for "bringing them on", despite Ms Alexander telling associates she thinks he has agreed.

If the SNP First Minister refuses to bring forward the date of the Commonwealth Games, instead sticking to the existing timetable, sources close to Wendy Alexander say that she will be able to claim that she has called Alex Salmond's bluff, and she will label him "a cowardy custard".
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Posted by: spagan at 4:28pm on Mon 12 May 08
Oh Douglas
My old Head of English claimed that sarcasm was the lowest form of wit.
However, I like it! Although I am keen to see an independent Scotland, I'm also happy to see that you are regaining your own "independence".
What you need to realise is that Tony Blair (and therefore all those committed to the "New Labour" movement) created a "Humpt y Dumpty". Now that it has truly fallen of its perch / out of its tree (aka off his wall) - it really cannot be put back together.
If you are still a 'left of centre' journalist - then it would be good to see your main focus as keeping the SNP to that agenda.
Anyway, best wishes - hold onto the sarcasm.
Slainte Mhor
Posted by: Curley Bill at 5:00pm on Mon 12 May 08
Oh Douglas, have the scales fallen from thine eyes?
Now, after reading your blog, I am convinced Wendy is history - there is no way you would have written the above without clearance from the Southern Branch of NuLabour... is there?
Anyway, it's a good piece, sir.
Posted by: Oscar at 5:17pm on Mon 12 May 08
Hahahaha well done Douglas, at last.

I hear they're trying to force the government to bring forward the Burns homecoming beano to this July and that Christmas should be brought forward to September.
Posted by: gg at 5:31pm on Mon 12 May 08
Whilst a little bit a satire never goes astray, there is a fundamental flaw in this post that goes to the heart of the issue Wendy Alexander has so incompetently tried to raise.

There is nothing that dictates the date of the referendum other than the likely date of the next general election. If the SNP were truly confident they would have passed legislation within their first year in Government and put the case to the people. Instead they hope to stir up trouble with Westminster, prop up a Tory Government and reach their Nirvana in 2010.

If WA actually was a politician rather than a policy wonk she would have announced a review of the Scot Lab position on the referendum and worked behind the scenes to get Westminster to include legislation in the Queens speech.

In the interim she should have built a coalition of support for an early referendum to stop the uncertainty. That Scotland likes having a strong shop steward in the guise of Alex Salmond is undeniable, that we want independence is at best debatable and at worst an outright lie.

The problem for Labour is that Wendy now has to go to let the necessary policy change take place. A new leader could step back, announce a review, build up the Commission and take the challenge to the SNP. Wendy is a busted flush and is now the biggest problem facing the Scot Labour party, particularly at a time when the mad left are on the rise again.
Posted by: subrosa at 5:46pm on Mon 12 May 08
A pleasant piece of satire. Its brightened up my Monday Douglas. Mind you, some things written in jest ...
Posted by: talorthane at 5:51pm on Mon 12 May 08
gg

the flaw at the heart of your post is that you make your comments bear no relation to the context in which events are taking place.

There would be no debate, at the current level, about independence or even enhanced devolution had it not been for the SNP's success in last May's election and in office ever since.

The fact is that events are being dictated by the SNP.

They put forward their manifesto, and the public voted for them on the basis of that manifesto, in greater numbers than any other party,

Remember, in last May's election, Labour stood on a platform of no changes to the devolution settlement and certainly no referendum on independence.

There was never going to be a cross (unionist) party agreement of an early referendum, as the Tories are utterly opposed to the idea and the Lib Dems ruled out the chance of office on this issue.

Labour have panicked at the suggestion that there could be a multi-option STV decision, and bounced themselves into the type of referendum that the SNP would prefer; a straight choice.

There is nothing that dictates that the date of the referendum should be 2010, except the SNP manifesto commitment to the electorate.

By the same token, there is nothing to dictate that it should be held sooner, except the panic emerging amongst the unionist parties that the SNP maight just succeed in this, as they have done in almost everything else they have done since coming to office.
Posted by: Wardog at 5:53pm on Mon 12 May 08
Douglas, you really are awful, but I like you.
Posted by: Disgusted Dorothy at 6:05pm on Mon 12 May 08
Nice one , Mr Fraser!
Posted by: George Laird at 6:07pm on Mon 12 May 08
Dear Douglas

I have to say that piece was extremely funny.

I have to say that I like sarcasum done well.

Be careful in Holyrood in case Alexander goes bonkers at you.
Posted by: Oscar at 6:43pm on Mon 12 May 08
Yes gg, isn't it terrible the SNP are improving Scotland, creating this zany confidence philosophy and to cap it all they're doing it DELIBERATELY. It's a crying shame so it is.
Posted by: John Leven at 7:17pm on Mon 12 May 08
GG

From your comment you seem to think that Alex Salmond has tremendous insight.

Instead they hope to stir up trouble with Westminster, prop up a Tory Government and reach their Nirvana in 2010.

To predict that the election would be in 2010 and that it would be a the tories in government, the man must a genius.

Mind you compared to Bendy Wendy, he is.
Posted by: Oscar at 7:53pm on Mon 12 May 08
Yes gg, isn't it terrible the SNP are improving Scotland, creating this zany confidence philosophy and to cap it all they're doing it DELIBERATELY. It's a crying shame so it is.
Posted by: Oscar at 7:54pm on Mon 12 May 08
Ooops never refresh and ignore the post data warning.
Posted by: Karin at 7:58pm on Mon 12 May 08
I have to say if douglas's blog is an indication of some new editorial policy then i really think we should support both douglas and the herald in this decision and all go out and buy the herald.

I think douglas is to be commended for showing exactly how silly wendy alexander has been. Although judging by GGs comments some people just cant see whats staring them in the face.
Posted by: Scott2006 at 9:10pm on Mon 12 May 08
Funny Douglas... and scarily enough just the whiff of truth about it.
Why have good government today and a minority administration needing cross party support to advance legislation in a timely manner, when a whirling dirvish Wendy only wants to avoid being seen as undemocratic and has no grasp of how to hold the administration to account as the leader of the opposition.

Wendy wants the scare stories to run and seek to frighten people with hobgoblins and phantom border posts, with all parts of the media going on a negative offensive in support of the Union. Ms Alexander wants a campaign where all gloom and doom is placed on Alex Salmond's shoulders by force of derision, hatred, misinformation and black arts of enormous lies in enough publications that they feed off the reporting of each other.

As you don't mention, but can't deny, Gordon B probably wont be PM in 2012, and Alex S might not be FM in 2014. Even if they are, Wendy A is on borrowed time - and by extolling a one dimensional negative vision she'd rather grandstand at playing at party politics for a position to attack nationalism when her version of socialism is a pathetic pose of no substance. Her one woman position dragging her party to the precipice is a high risk stategy - and she doesn't look like a person that can operate in a position of peril.

Wendy Alexander A Woman Of No Substance.
Posted by: Karin at 10:29pm on Mon 12 May 08
here by the way after seeing what wee wendy can do OR NOT as the case may be i would do a better job of being scottish head of london labour.

and im a nat.....................
Posted by: Karin at 10:39pm on Mon 12 May 08
douglas lets have a discussion about unionism. not brit nat unionism. but the actual workers unionism.

Why do the unions continue to support labour when labour are not supporting them. I thought unions were about the workers not politics or funding labour. Why dont the unions withhold payment to labour and decide who they are going to support with union funds based on which party is doing most for the workers this would give the unions far more power over the political parties than they currently enjoy at present. I know the labour party grew out of the union movement but the labour party is no longer a party of those who labour. We could really see an increase of the power of the unions if they stopped blindly supporting labour and instead asked their members who they wanted their subs to go to? Just thought i would ask you douglas seeing your a labour man and all.
Posted by: iain morrison at 12:14am on Tue 13 May 08
Brilliant just brilliant.
Posted by: Jim Mitchell at 12:31am on Tue 13 May 08
Douglas that was a very funny contribution, not as funny as gg's, but funny none the less.
Posted by: Wardog at 2:25am on Tue 13 May 08
FAO DOGLAS FRASER

Douglas, can the herald explain why comments are being continual banned from story's relating to Wendy Alexander.

Can you confirm rumours that Scottish labour are making complaints to the Herald to try and minimise open discussion and criticism of her policies?

I think the blogging community on these threads really deserves some kind of explanation here.

Wardog
Posted by: Karin at 7:26am on Tue 13 May 08
Wardog wrote:
FAO DOGLAS FRASER Douglas, can the herald explain why comments are being continual banned from story's relating to Wendy Alexander. Can you confirm rumours that Scottish labour are making complaints to the Herald to try and minimise open discussion and criticism of her policies? I think the blogging community on these threads really deserves some kind of explanation here. Wardog
i go to bed comments are there i wake up their gone was it the fact that i said i was going to buy the paper on the basis of the articles was it the fact i used the calculator on the glasgow city council webisite and said i was saving money under local income tax. what was the reason the comments were there and then they were gone. Wendy call did she..........................

well i was going out to buy the herald this morning and now guess what im not.

I told you that as long as things hadnt changed between twelve and now i urge everyone else not to buy the herald until free commenting is restored.

and once it is restored (if it is) then in your post put wether you are buying the paper or not based on how biased the article is or isnt.
Posted by: talorthane at 9:25am on Tue 13 May 08
Wardog wrote:
FAO DOGLAS FRASER Douglas, can the herald explain why comments are being continual banned from story's relating to Wendy Alexander. Can you confirm rumours that Scottish labour are making complaints to the Herald to try and minimise open discussion and criticism of her policies? I think the blogging community on these threads really deserves some kind of explanation here. Wardog
It makes you wonder what kind of pressure that a party in opposition in Scotland, and soon to be oppostion at Westminster, can exert, and to what lengths are they prepared to go to?

What kind of pressure would persuade professional journalists to remain silent as free discussion on their stories are blocked?

What kind of pressure would presuade an editor to put integrity toone side in order to pursue aims other than the truth?

What kind of pressure would allow stakeholders in a 225 year old Scottish institution to stand by while its reputation is put at risk for someone else's short term gain?
Posted by: spagan at 10:05am on Tue 13 May 08
More in the same vein!

WENDY ALEXANDER GOES TO TOILET BY HERSELF
THE Scottish Labour leader Wendy Alexander was celebrating last night after going to the toilet all by herself.

It is understood Alexander got down from the table after dinner and walked purposefully across the hall to the downstairs lavatory.

According to friends of the Labour leader, she pulled down her trousers and pants, climbed onto the seat, steadied herself and then did both, 'a pee and a poo'.

Labour activists in Scotland hailed yesterday's movement as a major step forward for the party, although Alexander did require some help with wiping.

It is the first time the Scottish leader has gone to the toilet unaided. Last year she got half way across the hall and was already pulling down her pyjama bottoms, before falling over and soiling herself in what one witness described as a 'spectacular explosion'.

Meanwhile Ms Alexander's brother, Douglas, the international development secretary, has recently moved on to Pampers Easy-up Pants and hopes to be using the toilet independently by the end of July.

A spokesman for prime minister Gordon Brown said: "The Scottish leader is now, officially, a big girl.

"It is for her to decide when and how she goes to the the toilet. We wish her luck and hope her new found confidence does not result in **** all over the floor."
Posted by: megz at 1:03pm on Tue 13 May 08
lol quite liked that, was funny.

sad fact though is that labour msps cannot talk for themselves so they can't really be expected to speak up for the people of Scotland.

I'm wasn't entirely convinced that WA was trying to bounce brown into a referendum. It does sound plausable that they had agreed to do this then he bottled it. But that said surely brown would be intelligent enough to realise he couldn't agree to a referendum in scotland while stoppping one in the UK over the EU.

The whole thing has been handled very badly and i don't think i'm the only one left confused by labours stance and reason why they u-turned and u-turned again.
Posted by: gavin48 at 3:17pm on Tue 13 May 08
Thanks Douglas really funny article, cruel but funny.
By the way what happened to the posts on the LIT story last night?
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