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   Web Issue 3233 August 22 2008   
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Salmond backs the wrong horse, but it’s all in a day’s work
ALISON CAMPSIEApril 19 2008
POETIC LICENCE: First Minister Alex Salmond talking to Robert Burns actor Donald Kay at the reopening of Alloway Kirk.
POETIC LICENCE: First Minister Alex Salmond talking to Robert Burns actor Donald Kay at the reopening of Alloway Kirk.

It was a day of business meets pleasure for Alex Salmond yesterday as he headed to Ayr Racecourse for the Scottish Grand National. And naturally, amid official engagements, the First Minister took the time to have a bit of a flutter.

After a well-thumbed copy of the Racing Post was produced from his personal assistant's case, Mr Salmond selected Quarry Town as a good bet, jockeyed by Tom Scudamore, placing £20 each-way on the contender.

Unfortunately, Quarry Town trailed in the race, leaving the First Minister £40 out of pocket - and his driver wondering where the nearest cash machine was. The First Minister, it seems, is not averse to borrowing a few quid during a bad day at the races.

Mr Salmond, a former racing tipster, was at the races primarily to lend support to the Poppy Scotland Appeal, which was raising money at the event.

The First Minister told guests of the charity: "One of the great problems about being First Minister is that my racing columns have gone a bit by the by. Thousands of people have said to me, Alex, why don't you give up the politics and get back to writing those columns?'. Well, the bit about giving up politics is true, I hear that all the time.

"Ayr Racecourse is one of my favourite places, but I did not accept this invitation to come here to relive the triumphs of a racing tipster.

It was to support Poppy Scotland. The Scottish Government will always stand behind your efforts."

Mr Salmond, after selecting the best-turned-out horse, was asked to present the trophy to the owner of Asian Style, winner of the first race of the event, the Tam o' Shanter.

Burns's famous horseman had been a focus of Mr Salmond's trip to Ayrshire earlier in the day, when he visited Alloway to officially open the restored Auld Kirk, which had been the inspiration for the poem and later the resting place of his father. Mr Salmond, who took to reciting the opening of Tam o' Shanter at the graveyard, said that his love for Burns's work stemmed from his "mother's milk" and the teachings of his former soprano teacher, whom he described as a "Burns fanatic".

Alloway Auld Kirk and graveyard has been restored in advance of the 2009 Homecoming Events, designed to draw back the Scots who have settled around he world.

Mr Salmond said: "South Ayrshire is at the epicentre of the homecoming, with the birthplace of the bard and the magnificent golf courses, and what better way to advertise it than the renovation of the most famous kirk yard in the whole of Scotland. I would think that Rabbie would be having a less than quiet smile to himself."

He later added: "Burns brings together many of the aspects which represent the best of Scotland. He was the true radical spirit of Scotland, that is what Hugh MacDiarmid called him."


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Posted by: The West Awake, Argyll on 10:00pm Fri 18 Apr 08
"Mr Salmond, who took to reciting the opening of Tam o' Shanter at the graveyard, said that his love for Burns's work stemmed from his "mother's milk" and the teachings of his former soprano teacher, whom he described as a "Burns fanatic"."


Even my admiration for Scotland's best ever politician can't let my head get round that he had a "soprano teacher"!!

What the hell IS a soprano teacher anyway?
Posted by: thesub, buenos Aires on 10:05pm Fri 18 Apr 08
Tony Soprano?
Posted by: Terrago, Ayrshire on 10:17pm Fri 18 Apr 08
The Scottish Grand National is tomorrow, Saturday. Subs please note.
Posted by: Duns Scotus, The Borders on 11:35pm Fri 18 Apr 08
The tombstone looks like an anglicised Victorian version. Pity it did not record the poet's parent's names in their guid Scots form of Burness and Broun.

We shouldn't just be restoring empty buildings. we should be restoring our whole national identity.
Posted by: Morag, Peeblesshire on 11:44pm Fri 18 Apr 08

Re "soprano teacher". I have a vague recollection of hearing that Alex Salmond was once a creditable treble, or boy soprano. However, I could well be entirely mixed up about that so don't quote me.

Posted by: Jwil, Lanarkshire on 1:18am Sat 19 Apr 08
The First Minister, it seems, is not averse to borrowing a few quid during a bad day at the races.

Really? Or are you just spinning a good yarn?
Posted by: Scunnert, Travelling in Nihlon on 6:27am Sat 19 Apr 08
From the Daily Mash:

http://www.thedailym
ash.co.uk/sport/spor
t-headlines/scotland
-dies-laughing-20071
121549/

SCOTLAND DIES LAUGHING

TRIBUTES are being paid to Scotland this morning after the entire country laughed itself to death.

Most would have been dead within minutes
The alarm was first raised at around 10pm last night as thousands of phone calls and text messages went unanswered.

Small groups of volunteers from Berwick-Upon-Tweed and Carlisle ventured north just after midnight only to find houses full of dead people gathered around still blaring television sets.

By dawn, as RAF helicopters flew over deserted city streets, it was clear that the whole country had suffered a catastrophic abdominal rupture.

Wayne Hayes, a special constable from Northumberland, said: "We went into one house in Dunbar and found three men sitting on the sofa with huge smiles on their faces, still holding cans of 70 shilling. They seemed to be at peace."

He added: "In a house near Edinburgh we found a man face down on the living room floor with his trousers and pants round his knees.

"It seems he may have been showing his bare buttocks to the television when he keeled over."

Roy Hobbs, a civil engineer from Northampton, said: "I got a call from my friend Ian in Stirling at about 9.50pm.

"He was already laughing when I answered the phone, but after about 25 minutes of the most vigorous and uncontrollable hilarity, everything suddenly went very quiet."

Moving tributes are already being placed along the Scotland-England border with many mourners opting to leave a simple bag of chips or a deep fried bunch of flowers.
Posted by: Disgusted Dorothy, Glasgow on 9:54am Sat 19 Apr 08
Scunnert , you should have told everyone that the Daily Mash posted this after the England / Croatia match last year, when the commentators said it would be a skoosh case for England so lets fill in the time talking about who they (England ) will meet next!
See Croatia ! Great wee team!
Posted by: JABRE, FEARN on 10:08am Sat 19 Apr 08
Very funny Scunnert--At least they died laughing . I wonder what they would have died of if your lot were in power--doh!!
Posted by: sam, greenock on 10:35am Sat 19 Apr 08
JABRE wrote:
Very funny Scunnert--At least they died laughing . I wonder what they would have died of if your lot were in power--doh!!
Happiness?
Posted by: No War But The Class War, Embra on 12:57pm Sat 19 Apr 08
Why the gloom? And the mockery?

I thought this would have warmed your wee hearts.

Posted by: Toophingers, Bellshill. on 1:39pm Sat 19 Apr 08
Reminds me of the Wee Yin's prevaricating wee brother Dougie's deliberately mis-leading broadcast remarks about Mr Salmond's (MA Economics and History and one time senior financial and oil adviser to the Royal Bank of Scotland) financial acumen.
'He boasts he's an economist. Let's be honest. The biggest financial decision he has ever had to make was how much to put on the three-thirty at Kempton Park'.
Honest!
We can only hope prevaricating dosen't run in the family
Posted by: rob4i, Scottish Borders on 2:13pm Sat 19 Apr 08
Toophingers, Alex Salmond was making economic decisions for one of the largest financial institutions in Europe rather than being a NEW Labour politician with NO experience of a proper job and pretending to be something they are not.
You can always pick out the New Labour OR Lib.Dem. politicians or supporters with their sour grapes, their bitter resentments of being booted from office for incompetence.
Posted by: Hamish McKropotkin, Bannockburn on 3:27pm Sat 19 Apr 08
rob4i wrote:
Toophingers, Alex Salmond was making economic decisions for one of the largest financial institutions in Europe rather than being a NEW Labour politician with NO experience of a proper job and pretending to be something they are not. You can always pick out the New Labour OR Lib.Dem. politicians or supporters with their sour grapes, their bitter resentments of being booted from office for incompetence.
Alex Salmond was taking economic decisions for one of the largest financial institutions in Europe? Really?
Posted by: Alastair, Aberdeen on 3:41pm Sat 19 Apr 08
Hamish McKropotkin wrote:
rob4i wrote: Toophingers, Alex Salmond was making economic decisions for one of the largest financial institutions in Europe rather than being a NEW Labour politician with NO experience of a proper job and pretending to be something they are not. You can always pick out the New Labour OR Lib.Dem. politicians or supporters with their sour grapes, their bitter resentments of being booted from office for incompetence.
Alex Salmond was taking economic decisions for one of the largest financial institutions in Europe? Really?
Really.
Posted by: Los Angeles, Edinburgh on 9:55am Sun 20 Apr 08
LoL
Posted by: Strathturret, Montrose on 9:32pm Sun 20 Apr 08
While Gordon 'North Briton' Brown was managing the bar at the Edinburgh University Union.

Did Brown ever do a real job before he became an MP?
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