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   Web Issue 3149 May 16 2008   
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Carphone Warehouse customers in for not-so-rude awakening
TIM SHARPMay 10 2008

THERE was an immediate sign of the changing times at Carphone Warehouse after the company sold half of its retail business to US electronics giant Best Buy this week.

Its media presentation about the transaction was preceded by a "safe harbour" statement, a US phenomenon that is designed to protect the company against litigation over any comments it makes. "It basically says you cannot believe anything we tell you," said Carphone Warehouse founder Charles Dunstone. "Welcome to our new world."

It will be interesting to see how far reaching the cultural shift is on either side of the deal as the companies roll out across the UK a chain of giant Best Buy stores, stocking everything from computers to fridges.

There is some scepticism about whether a US retailer can ever be successful in Europe, and a video about Best Buy shown at the presentation shows why. It featured a succession of happy, smiling employees giving each other high fives, engaging cheerily in a range of bonding activities and even talking enthusiastically to customers.

This is utterly out of kilter with the UK consumer electronics market. What Best Buy needs if it is to create the sort of customer experience we expect is a workforce second to none in its sullenness and unwillingness to assist anyone who doesn't already know exactly what product they want.

Apparently the company proposes creating teams of technicians to assist buyers to install their products when they get home, threatening the sole productive household role of teenagers across the land and leaving a dangerously large hole in the typical post-purchase weekend.

The sheer scale of the Best Buy outlets is also worrying. Does this mean they might actually stock the goods they have on display?

Acronymbiciles pen another winner BUSINESS Diary is a huge fan of made-up social phenomena created by companies' marketing departments for the sole purpose of pushing their products, and Scottish Widows should be congratulated on the sheer scale of its latest contribution.

The company believes that WAGs, the stick thin but vacuous wives and girlfriends who follow their famous men around, are being replace by BAGs, the boyfriend golddiggers.

The company went to the trouble of surveying 2600 people and found that almost twice as many men as women would now consider marrying someone purely for money and a luxurious lifestyle, with nearly one in five men admitting to harbouring gold-digging fantasies.

What Business Diary particularly liked was the variety of BAG-related terms. According to Widows, there is the Hand-BAG, a BAG who sticks close to his partner; BAG-gage, being weighed down having to support your BAG; BAG Lady, who goes from BAG to BAG; Carpet-BAGging, BAGs who go for vulnerable rich women, get money and get out quickly; Bin BAG, the BAG that gets dumped.

Name game makes good progress BUSINESS Diary is pleased to note biotechnology company Plethora Solutions is doing well, according to recent research. A company that combines two business cliches in one name deserves commercial success.

We just look forward to the day when it spins out subsidiaries Dynamic Future and Innovative Advance.


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Posted by: Sam, Glasgow on 7:29am Sat 10 May 08
oh for goodness sake Carphone warehouse and its appauling Talk Talk broadband service have been doing that for years
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